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The Beginning

At first there was nothing, literally nothing, but then god came and created stars, spacedust, planets and other shit

Beginning of Earth

Some fucking asteroids came to earth and practically made earth good.

At first everyone on earth was just a water ball, and they practically cloned themselves, but all that changed when two water balls accidentally fucked each and created a water ball that had things from both of it's parents

Fishes and shit

Eventually those water balls evolved into fishes and and a lot of scary looking creaturss

One day some fishes were so fucking scared of giant sea creatures that they evolved a lot of new cool shit.

Lizards and shit

One day these fishes went on land and evolved into Retarded Fishards, one day another fucking asteroid came and wiped out a lot of shit, thankfully a fishard basically had retard sons that survived it all, they would eventually evolve into Reptiles and Mammals

The Dinosaurs

They were they biggest and scariest looking motherfuckers on earth at the time, meanwhile one of the retard fishard sons evolved into a fucking mouse

Another fucking asteroid

One day another fucking asteroid landed on earth, this time on Mexico, this asteroid would basically kill most of the big dinosaurs, the small ones evolved into birds

The Discovery Channel

Eventually the mouse would declare himself the king of earth, since the living dinosaurs were barely even a threat thanks to the asteroid. Eventually the mouse had a descendant thag barely even looked like a mouse.

The Planet of the Apes

Eventually a monkey finally knew how to walk on two legs, unlike his/her other brothers

The Planet of the Humans

Later there came new species, like Homo Habilis, Homo Erectus (which is it's actually name), Hobbits, Homo Sapiens and Neanderthals

Homo Sapiens and Neanderthals were the most important ones, one of them is the ancestor of us and the other is the ancestor is the ancestor of white people. Eventually Neanderthals would become extinct, either because of fucking or genocide.

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